Are we products of our environment or products of our expectations?



"Do you think that we're products of our environments? I think so, or maybe products of our expectations. Others' expectations of us or our expectations. I mean others' expectations that you take on as your own. I realize how difficult it is to separate the two. The expectations that others place on us help us form our expectations of ourselves.” Wes Moore

 I agree whole heartedly with Wes when it comes to expectations. The expectations others place on us, really do help us form expectations of ourselves. The sociologist Charles Horton Cooley coined the concept of the ‘looking-glass self” which he explained as individuals developing their concept of self by observing how they are perceived by others. this concept suggests that social settings help build your self-image and expectations. Judgement we receive from others are used by us to measure our self-worth values and behavior. I believe that we are products of our expectations whether those expectations are our own or stem from others.

What I expect from myself has always guided my path in life. Be it with my education or my home life, I always had high expectations of myself. I grew up in a violent home and eventually in a one parent household and at one point on the verge of homelessness. All those factors along with raging teenage hormones, were breeding ground for a hard life. Because I knew that my mother had high expectations of me and always encouraged me to getup and go get, I knew I could not allow my environmental factors to dictate my end in life. Wes More’s beginnings and his parents’ expectations were a big factor in his success in life. On the other side the other Wes More’s environment coupled wit the expectations were the determining factors in his life turning out the way it did.

Wes More said “Someone, at some point, put those expectations in our minds and we either live up to them, or live down to them. The only difference in my life was that there were people who were willing to hold on to my long dreams long enough for me to grow and to mature and to find out that they, too, were my dreams" Wes more  This resonated with me so strongly because when I think of how hard it was for me to make the decision to return to school as an adult, it was the people around me, my support system, my son who was watching, knowing that they all had high expectations of me, those were the reasons why I pushed even when I didn’t want to.

Like Wes, not having my father in the home, affected my life greatly in many negative ways. I chose to use his absence as a driving force for my life. I always wanted to show him that his leaving did not create a failure as he thought it would. He believed that if we chose to stay with my mother when he decided to abandon the family, that we would turn out to be failures. What he didn’t realize was there was more than just HIS expectations at play. My mother’s expectations and more importantly my expectations of myself would greatly outweigh his and outweigh my unfortunate life circumstances. 

Comments

  1. Brianna OcasioApril 10, 2022 at 8:23 PM

    Hi Rebecca! Yes, I do agree that other people's expectations of us influences our expectations of ourselves. I'm a psychology major and there's this thing called the self fulfilling prophecy where people's expectations can influence a person to live up to those standards because of the subconscious mind. I think it's important to note as well that expectations are an environment or part of it. It you have someone who has high expectations, it creates an environment that may be supportive and/or an environment that pushes you to work hard like you explained in your situation.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Jessica's BlogApril 25, 2022 at 7:40 AM

    Rebecca,
    Great content and argument. Make sure to revise for minor mistakes. As a suggestion, review in-text citation format.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Literacy History Blog Assignment 1

Image
My name is Rebecca Jean Baptiste. I am 31 years old and have a 6-year-old son. I am attending NJCU in pursuit of a degree in Sociology concentration in Crime and social behavior. I've always has an interest in working in criminal justice somehow. when I first began my career exploration, I wanted to be a police officer. My family was not at all supportive of that because they always thought of the worst that could happen. Additionally, coming from a Haitian household, I was always being pushed towards the medical field. I did not go to college until I was 21. I enrolled at Medgar Evers with the full intention of going for nursing, I quickly became a liberal arts major once I found out that less than 20% of the applicants were admitted to the program. I attended school on and off because I was working full time. I left discouraged when I was 24 because I started a new job and had my own place and needed to be able to support myself. In 2016, I moved to NJ with my son and enrolled at...
Read more

Is Fast Food the New Tobacco?

Image
Is Fast Food the New Tobacco? Tobacco has for decades been linked to cancer, asthma, and many other illnesses. The CDC.gov website has history on when the government finally put labels on cigarettes. According to the site, On January 11, 1964, Luther L. Terry, M.D., Surgeon General of the U.S. Public Health Service, released the first report of the Surgeon General’s Advisory Committee on Smoking and Health. In 1966 the Federal government mandated that cigarette packs have a warning on them from the surgeon general. The question of whether Fast food is the new tobacco is a loaded one. Some like myself would say yes. I say yes because it seems the government is trying to regulate fast food as they do tobacco and yet are not doing a great job. Slapping a label on things has never entirely deterred a person from using a product. Radley Balko’s article ‘What You Eat is Your Business’ published in 2004 talked about the government attempting to make mandates to control obesity. He said, “Con...
Read more

Basketball quickly becomes a getaway for Wes and his friends. What activities do you enjoy doing while trying to cope with difficult situations?

Image
  Basketball quickly becomes a getaway for Wes and his friends. What activities do you enjoy doing while trying to cope with difficult situations? Whenever I have to cope with a difficult situation, my very first step is always a nap. I think a nap is the best first step to coping with a difficult situation, because it is a recharge. I think of how anyone in IT when they’re trying to troubleshoot your issue always tells you to turn it off and turn it back on. I take that approach. When I’m faced with a tough decision, or have to have a difficult conversation, I take a nap to help myself reenergize, and also buy some time. Sleep has become a great coping method because it allows me to rest and not approach any situation while tired. My mom has always said it is a blessing to be able to sleep when you have problems or are stressed out, because most people have insomnia when they’re stressed out. My body automatically gets ready for sleep when I’m stressed. The next thing I usually ...
Read more